Just So You Know

Just so you know, I’m not ignoring you when I don’t answer your comment (or your email or your text) right away.  I have four kids and a Mike and a house that need me.  I’m not good at juggling, and sometimes the more I have to do, the more I start to slow down.

Just so you know, if you visit my house, it will be messy.   I start to clean, only to hear a giant sploosh, followed by an “uh oh”, and the discovery that the 3 year old just spilled her paint rinse cup.  Again.  Or dumped out all 8836256 of her brother’s legoes, or smashed a cracker all over the couch, or shed her muddy clothes all over the kitchen.  And that’s okay.

Just so you know, as far as I’m concerned, people trump “things” every time.  Which means that if I’m faced with mopping the dirty floor and playing ring-around-the-rosy with the girl, or reading with the 7 year old, or talking “Minecraft” with the 11 year old, or watching a Nerf video with the 14 year old… the kids will win.  Every time.

Just so you know, my backyard is messy too.   Partly because my 6 chickens are like children to me too, and their ability to be able to roam happy and free is more important to me than tidiness…. and partly because right now, my kids need my attention more than my yard.

Just so you know, I don’t believe in putting people in boxes:

When you see my three year old screaming crying in the grocery store, please don’t assume that she is “defiant” or “manipulative” or a “drama queen.”   She is passionate and enthusiastic and full of energy, and I love that about her.  She is sweet and funny and loves to entertain.  She is awesome.

When you realize that my seven year old is not yet reading, please don’t assume he is a “slower” learner.   I can barely keep up with what he is learning on a daily basis, and he is continually amazing me with both his knowledge and his spirit.  He has a huge heart and gives great hugs.  He’s awesome too.

When you hear that my 11 year old is passionate about video games, please don’t assume he in any way resembles your misinformed image of a “lazy gamer.”  He is intelligent and active and well-rounded, and overall one of the coolest people you’ll ever get to be around.  He is awesome.

When you introduce yourself to my 14 year old, and notice that he sounds “different”, please don’t make assumptions about his intelligence or his abilities.  He is smart and skillful and creative, and he has a better sense of humor than just about anyone I know.  He’s the most loyal friend you could ever hope to make, and he is also one of my top 5 favorite people on the planet.  And oh yes, he’s awesome.

And while I’m on the subject of assumptions:

Just so you know, I don’t fit neatly into one of those boxes either.  I am a Christian who finds much of what’s cloaked in “Christian” labels abhorrent (especially when it comes to parenting).  I believe in kindness to all creatures.  I believe in freedom and acceptance and tolerance.  I don’t raise an eyebrow at obscenities, but you’ll see me react in a big hurry if you say something disrespectful about a child, or make a racial stereotype, or a homophobic slur, or use the word “retarded” (or any of its variants) other than in the way it was intended.

Just so you know, the fact that we homeschool does not mean we’re exactly like your neighbor or your friend or your cousin who homeschools.  We have our own reasons, and our own beliefs, and our own way of life.

Just so you know, you can change my mind about a whole lot of things, but not when it comes to God.  Not when it comes to my kids.  Not when it comes to parenting.  And not when it comes to school.

Just so you know.

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12 Comments

Filed under about me, acceptance, homeschooling, kids, parenting

12 Responses to Just So You Know

  1. That first paragraph was for me, wasn’t it? :-p just so you know…. I’m glad I met you in the blogosphere. Just so you know, I think you are an amazing mom and friend. Just so you know. 🙂

    • Jen

      LOL No! I just have a jillion people waiting on me to respond to something, or send them something, or do something, and it makes me feel bad…. so it was sort of my general proclamation to the world to make myself feel better. It was really just about ME. 😉

      And back at you. <3

  2. Carma

    Geez, you COUNTED your son’s Legos? 😉
    Just so you know, I agree with everything you just said. Except I don’t have chickens.

  3. Great post! I’m thinking we have the same amount of legos but I’m not counting them!

    Since I’ve had the pleasure of meeting your family I love what you said about each child and a Mike, LOL!

    Everett and Jared have been IM’ing each other almost daily, it’s so neat the we connected!

    • jen

      I knew what you meant. 😉 And I think it’s so cool that the kids are all connecting too. They have a few other unschooling FB friends now, but yours are some of just a very few that they’ve been able to meet in person. I love that we were able to meet!!

  4. This is such a wonderful post. WONDERFUL! I just love reading this blog and I can’t get enough…I’m so grateful for my friend, Connie, who introduced me to it. So inspirational!

  5. I came accross your blog tonight and I’ve been reading your popular posts. I really like what you have to say. God has been teaching me about many of the things you talk about. I’ve been encouraged and challeged by your life. I will be back to read more. 🙂

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