Yesterday was Easter, which means we got cleaned up all nice-like, went to church with my parents and sister, and spent the day eating good foods and visiting.
I realized on the way up to Sandi’s house that I’d forgotten our real camera, so five minutes after we stepped in the door, I handed Mike my phone and asked him to take the one and only picture of the day before the kids had changed and run out to play.
It’s sort of a tradition to take a picture of me with the kids on Easter, so I’m glad that he snapped it, and I’m especially glad that Tegan’s face is already covered in chocolate. It’s very her. Otherwise – in very un-Jen-like fashion I might add – I spent little time stressing out about the lack of both the camera and pictures, and just enjoyed the day visiting with my family.
This morning though… right now as I write… is about solitude. Mike is at work, the kids are still sleeping, and I’m taking that big cleansing breath I always so desperately need after busy weekends.
The past several months (and really, the past couple of years if I’m being honest) have been painful ones. No, not so much painful as uncomfortable, as I’ve been getting pushed and pulled and stretched so far out of my comfort zone that I don’t even know where it is anymore. Lots of growing pains, and lots and lots of quiet introspection.
I came across this poem this morning, and at the risk of being too philosophical and woo-woo for a Monday morning, it really spoke to me and where I’ve been lately:
Without solitude, Love will not stay long by your side.
Because Love needs to rest as well, so that it can journey through the heavens and reveal itself in other forms.
Without solitude, no plant or animal can survive, no soil can remain productive for any length of time, no child can learn about life, no artist can create, no work can grow and be transformed.
Solitude is not the absence of Love, but its complement.
Solitude is not the absence of company, but the moment when our soul is free to speak to us and help us decide what to do with our life.
Therefore, blessed are those who do not fear solitude, who are not afraid of their own company, who are not always desperately looking for something to do, something to amuse themselves with, something to judge.
If you are never alone, you cannot know yourself.
And if you do not know yourself, you will begin to fear the void.
But the void does not exist. A vast world lies hidden in our soul, waiting to be discovered. There it is, with all its strength intact, but it is so new and so powerful that we are afraid to acknowledge its existence.
Just as Love is the divine condition, so solitude is the human condition. And for those who understand the miracle of life, those two states peacefully coexist.
― Paulo Coelho