Earlier this week, Always brand sanitary napkins announced that they would be removing a female symbol from their packaging, in an effort to be more inclusive of its transgender and non-binary customers.
The internet then proceeded to lose its mind.
“This has gotten ridiculous!
“The height of stupidity!”
“Men cannot and do not menstruate!”
This little symbol, which many people had probably never even noticed, suddenly became the harbinger of everything that was good and true in the world. Removing it would be tantamount to scourging the rights of menstruating women everywhere.
Let’s all take a collective step back, and look at what’s happening here.
Most – not all – women menstruate. We know this. Nothing is going to change it. If you’re a women who somehow feels threatened or minimized by Always’ decision, there’s no need. No one is denying your existence. No one is denying that you menstruate.
Some – not all – transgender men and non-binary individuals also menstruate.
“But! But! If they have a uterus they’re not a man!” I know. I hear your objections, loud and clear.
But here’s the thing, and it’s important: Intersex people exist. Non-binary people exist. Transgender people exist. It might make you uncomfortable. It might even make you angry. Heck, I’m fully prepared at the anger directed at me for even writing these words. But your discomfort, your anger, your disbelief does not change facts. And the fact is, those living outside of typical gender constructs are no different than you and I. They are human beings, just trying to get through the day like anyone else. Living, breathing, loving, learning…. and yes, dealing with all the messy and inconvenient aspects of humanness, which sometimes includes such things as having a period.
Your moral outrage at Always’ decision to help them feel more included sends a very real, very unsettling message. This already marginalized segment of society is literally being told :
You don’t matter.
You don’t belong.
You don’t exist.
If omitting a tiny symbol can’t hurt you (and it can’t), why on earth would its removal be anything but a positive step if it helped others feel more included? What harm is there in being more welcoming? What is the cost of affirming someone else’s existence?
It literally costs you nothing.
You may not agree with gender fluidity, you may not even believe it exists. But there are very real people with very real feelings who would beg to differ. Those people are being hurt, and the rest of us have a choice: We can add to the hurt, or we can extend a hand. We can ostracize, or we can welcome. We can shun, or we can include.
And listen, I am far from the person I want to be, and God knows I could use help in the loving people department. But this one seems like a no-brainer to me. If my actions, if my words, if my behavior can make someone feel more worthy, more accepted, more seen, then I’m going to do my best to make it happen.
We pay a price for outrage and anger. Kindness is free.
I wasn’t aware of the matter, but you are spot on here. Jesus hung out with the marginal folks all the time. Why Christians are so adamant about non-inclusion is mind boggling — and this has nothing to do with morality, just hygiene. If they hadn’t made the point of trying to be inclusive, I bet hardly anyone would have noticed.
Amen.
I don’t know what to say about this other than THANK YOU for being you, for putting your thoughts out into the world, and for really cutting through a ton of absolute crap in order to get to the real point – let’s just be humans. Kind humans. Inclusive humans.
Also, I don’t even get a period. Haven’t for 15+ years. But I’m going to buy some Always and donate them to a local organization. Because I DEFINITELY don’t want inclusivity to hurt them.
Exactly this. Thank you for so eloquently stating what’s been on my heart. Beautiful!!!
Thank you! This is lovely. Even as a menopausal women, I appreciate the view that I am not any less of a woman now that I no longer menstruate. My transgender daughter also does not menstruate, but that doesn’t make her less of a woman either.
Testify. Three out of four of my kids are some version of transgender. They’re also honor students, amazing friends and siblings, activists, and sources of pride and strength. They deserve to be included too.
Yes!! This is so well said! Kindness is free. I have to share this. I really feel like people need to understand this perspective.
This is so well said. Thank you for writing this.
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Spot on! I am a woman. I still menstruate. I have always used Always products. I never noticed the female symbol probably because it didn’t trigger me to feel gender dysphoria. My trans son menstruates and he knows firsthand the horrors of body dysphoria. If this one little step helps him and others like him, great! Always is like the kid at the playground who’s nice to everyone and sucks up to the recess bully who keeps hogging the swings.
Beautifully said. The sign of privilege is that you feel something is being taken away when given to someone else. I guess that includes a little symbol on a package.
So well said. I continue to marvel at the fact that people get upset about areas that do not affect them. Who does this hurt? No one. It’s a positive step and we need more of this. More big companies getting onboard with supporting all people. Inclusion is so important. Hopefully someday this won’t even be a topic for discussion.
Beautifully stated!